wine by the color

Friday, May 12, 2006

Some random things to end the week...

I was again reminded that no matter how old I get, I still have the mindset of a 12 year old. At yoga Wednesday night, my instructor referred to the anus when describing a position. It wasn't easy, but I was able to keep my fit of giggles on the inside.

Yesterday, I took the day off for what I call a GYST day - Get Your Shit Together. Since I'm about to hit the road for the majority of the summer, I decided I better get my shit in order while I have the chance. I developed an ambitious to-do list and tackled most of them. Broken doors were fixed, closets were cleaned, blinds were purchased, photos were framed. Oh, and hair was cut. I didn't think it was that dramatic, but every person I've seen this morning has commented on it, so perhaps it is.

While running errands, I stopped at the crazy nephews' house to pick up something, and was treated to two fine one-liners from Adam. First, he expressed interest in visiting Casa Magnolia for a sleepover. I said we'd find a date soon, and he replied: "Yes, we've got to get that on the calendar" with all the professionalism of a seasoned business executive. Then, as he and Matthew wrestled on the floor, he cried out, "He's hitting me in the parts!" Nothing better than a five year old talking about his man parts.

Last on the list was a sewing class at an area fabric store last night. My parents got me a sewing machine for Christmas and I figured it was time I learned how to use it. I've gone twice and it's quite helpful. It's actually easier than I would have thought.

But there were a surprisingly high number of men in the store. Not men like Seth, who you might think were buying supplies to make something fabulous. Men who were clearly sent by their wives, on a mission for fabric or thread or some such thing. Without fail, each of these men was wandering aimlessly, lost in confusion. Why would women do this to their spouses? Fabric stores are not a happy place for men. Based on what I saw last night, I think that men, given the choice of going out to buy feminine hygiene products or fabric, would hit the tampon aisle every time.

A few news items...

You just KNOW there is more to this story than the naked officer is saying.

Speaking of there being more to the story, why did this cat shoot at Siegfried and Roy's house? Outside of being a little nutty, which might not fall far from the tree...

Outside court, Amy Ford, who turns 61 on Monday, said she didn't exchange words in the courtroom with her son, whom she said she had not seen since 1999. "But with his eyes, he said, 'Hi Mom."


I tried to post this photo but just can't get it to work, so you'll have to click on the link instead. It's worth the effort. Philly fans really put their best foot forward during Mr. Bonds' visit last week. Nice work, City of Brotherly Love!

And finally, now I'm even happier that the Jets drafted D-Brick instead of this assclown. Isn't it somewhat disingenuous for someone who's writing a diary for the Evil Empire to complain about a lack of privacy? And if you are concerned with how you're being portrayed in the media, perhaps you should stay away from the biggest media whore on the planet.

I'm just saying.


  • At 5/12/2006 1:41 PM, Blogger SJPSandman said…

    I love it when you refer to someone as an "assclown."

  • At 5/12/2006 3:52 PM, Blogger todd a said…

    When will we get to say, "Matt Todd Marinovich."

  • At 5/12/2006 4:37 PM, Blogger Joependleton said…

    I gotta tell you Jerseygirl. I was with the Philly fans until they gave Mr. Roids a standing O after his mamouth HR Sunday night.

    What a bunch of assclowns.

    That is a great word, very underused and underrated./

  • At 5/12/2006 7:06 PM, Blogger jersey girl said…

    "Assclown" comes from Office Space and is definitely one of my favorite ways to refer to such folks. I also like "fucktart," but "assclown" is better for a wide-ranging audience (Hi Mom).

    They gave him a standing O? Unacceptable. Too much love, brotherly city.

    Todd, I don't believe the Leinart-Marinovich comparisons can start until Leinart gets arrested.

    I remember watching a segment about Marinovich on a Real Sports-like show before he ever got to college. Just watching it, and listening to his nutty father talk about how he had never let Todd have fast food, you just knew it wasn't going to end well.

  • At 5/15/2006 4:46 PM, Blogger geoff mosher said…

    I'm kind of partial to "fuck-stick." My chemistry teach called me that in ninth grade. I can't say he was wrong.

    Ass-clown, especially when used to describe Michael Bolton, is a perfectly cromulent word.


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