wine by the color

Monday, July 17, 2006

Someone sent me one of those "getting to know you" e-mails yesterday and one of the questions was ... name four places you'd rather be. My answer: nowhere.

Last night was the first night I slept in my bed since June 19th. It was a crazy month of travel, and it is damn nice to be home. I arrived at EWR at 6:30 a.m. via the redeye and was on the softball field by 9:45 a.m. Despite giving up 10 runs in the first inning and back-to-back-to-back homers later in the game, we rallied for the win.

I spent the rest of the day in my brother's pool. They got a solar cover so the pool was a toasty 88 degrees, but it still felt good. It was still about 90 degrees cooler than it feels outside. After two weeks in the Pacific Northwest's lovely 60-degree temperatures, returning to this sweltering pit of heat and humidity has been a bit of a shock.

Now I've got just eight days to tend to a crowded personal, business and social agenda. Already done: bought a new washer and dryer and spent the afternoon with the crazy nephews, who are peacefully slumbering in the guest room as I type. Next up: Bon Jovi with the Sandman. My sister-in-law is also due at any moment (hopes she), and it'd be great if she could pop out the kid before I leave next week, as I'll be gone again for three weeks. I'm sure she'd be happy to not be 8+ months pregnant as temperatures hover in the triple-digit neighborhood.

One of the upsides of my frequent travel is that I have the opportunity to catch up on movies. Thanks to the Continental’s in-flight offerings and my outfit’s policy of letting us watch movies in hotel rooms, I’ve caught a few lately. Some quick reviews...

“Last Holiday” – Queen Latifah, a fine Jersey Girl, is quite likable. And that’s good, because that’s the only positive thing I’ll be saying about this movie. Oh, and I guess it’s nice to see Timothy Hutton, one of my favorites in the 80s, getting work. It’s too bad it’s this sort of work. Couldn’t they make Taps 2?

“Aquamarine” – I have never walked out of a movie theater. The closest I ever came was during a viewing of “Pret A Porter (Ready to Wear)” – absolute dreck. That said, had I somehow been in a theater when this was being shown, I’d have walked out. I wanted to walk off the plane. Even the cat they got to play the "non-descript teenage love interest" wasn't that hot. If you're going to subject people to this sort of cinematic shit, at least give them something to look at.

“The Perfect Man” – adhering to the ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say’ philosophy, I will say that Mr. Big is in this movie, and that is good. And Heather Locklear bakes beautiful, delicious-looking cakes. Huh. Two positive things. No doubt two more than it deserves.

“Failure to Launch” – I watched this for two reasons … be it misguided, I have a soft spot for Terry Bradshaw ("where I come from, we call that bait"), and I would love nothing more than to have Matthew McConaughey and his bongos visit Casa Magnolia for an evening. Those two things were nowhere near enough to make this a good movie. Stench.

“Imagine Me and You” – Girl falls in love at first site with another girl. On her wedding day. To a man. I didn’t hate this movie, but I don’t know that it will be finding a mainstream audience anytime soon.

"Something New" - a black financial whiz with a chip on her shoulder falls for her white, easy-going gardener. I can't believe I just used those words to describe an actual movie script. I can't believe I watched the whole thing. I can't believe I checked out the soundtrack (many of which were written by Wendy and Lisa of Prince fame).

“Derailed” – I think that people probably stayed away from this movie because they suspected it was a typical Jennifer Aniston fluffy piece of crap. That was a mistake. What a good flick. Definitely worth watching.

But speaking of Jennifer Aniston fluffy pieces of crap…

“Rumor Has It” – The rumor was true. This movie was bad. I was rooting for a woman to hook up with someone she thought was her father. That can't be good.

“Chronicles of Narnia” – there are three things that are usually a guaranteed nap for me when it comes to cinema – accents (Colin Firth and Hugh Grant notwithstanding), costumes and science fiction. This flick more or less nailed that entire trifecta, and yet I still enjoyed it. The best of the airline offerings of late.

More to come soon. I've got three more weeks on the road, including more trips across the country. Can't wait to see what crap Hollywood subjects me to next.


  • At 7/19/2006 5:44 PM, Blogger todd a said…

    Couldn't agree with you more. Narnia was actually a pretty entertaining flick. We actually had a class trip to check out that flick. Of course, I was not asked to attend....instead I was relegated to watching all the BAD kids back at school. And what did the 8th grade teachers decide to show them back in the classrooms? Some OLD English flick. These kids could relate to Martin Lawrence and not Bill Shakespeare.

    That was a real HOOT.

    I wish I read your blog before I saw Failure to Launch. Gawd awful.


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