All you need to know about my ongoing lack of interest in the National Basketball Association is that while game 1 of the NBA Finals plays on network television, I am watching an NFL playoff game from 2002 between New England and the Raiders on the NFL Network. It is snowing like mad in this game. I hope it doesn't come down to a field goal...

Perhaps this young lady should have attended the getting-to-know-bears symposium offered in this area recently?

Several years ago, a group of us went camping in upstate New York. As was always the case when tents, coolers of beer and card games that lasted for days were involved, we had a blast, with one notable exception...

We were always careful to properly dispose of our garbage, making sure there was no smell of food anywhere near our campsite. Attracting wild animals was low on our to-do list.

One night, after a lengthy evening of beer and cards, we retired to our respective tents. Several hours into the evening, my cousin and I were awakened by the sound of twigs and leaves crackling outside our tent.

Instantly, we knew there were animals outside our abode. We could hear them walking around the tent, pausing every few steps, then continuing to circle our defenseless, panicked (and not entirely sober) selves.

We wondered if the smell of the burgers we had eaten hours earlier was still on our hands. Had we unknowingly spilled beer on ourselves in a drunken moment? Certain we were about to be attacked by who knows which and how many animals, we were sweating in fear and clinging to each other. I remember a hushed conversation about whether it would be best to yell out to the others for help or to keep quiet to avoid attracting attention from our furry prowlers.

Making matters worse was that my brother was snoring loudly throughout this entire event in his tent on the other side of our campsite. Initially, I was concerned he would be easy prey for the vicious predators. Then I was irritated that he didn't awaken for the excitement, and that my cousin and I were about to be eaten and he was going to sleep through it.

But the animals eventually tired of pacing around our tent and departed. Looking back, our fright was no doubt unnecessary and ridiculous. But it didn't feel like it at that moment.

I really want to address the recent discovery that I know an actual carny. But due to how I know this person, it's probably best to avoid that topic.

And that is a shame.