As I entered the Gold's Gym in my home-away-from-home early this morning, I noticed a strange sign: "No Picture Cell Phones Allowed." I wondered why such a sign would be necessary.

It didn't take me long to find an answer...

Take this tank top:











Then add these shorts:













Then, tuck the tank top into the shorts, take away all the muscles, add a sizable beer belly and an abundance of back hair, and I can understand why they don't want folks capturing these moments on film. Quite frankly, it just doesn't reflect well on the Gold's Gym franchise.

Of course, had I taken my cell phone inside the gym, I'd certainly have captured this scene. But who could have guessed such entertainment would be available at 5:45 a.m.? Is this normal? I usually go to a women's-only gym, so I don't know if this is what's currently en vogue for the exercising man.

I tried to watch television instead of gaping at the spectacle. But because I'm in the south, three of the big-screen TVs were tuned to evangelists. One was broadcasting Fox News, another station featured an infomercial and the last one was airing the local news. So instead I watched the live show.

As a side note, finding the above photos of the tank top and shorts was no simple task. It required a lot of searching and at least one horrifying series of options. Don't ever do a search for "men's tight short bodysuits." You could wind up coming across something like this. Clicking on that link is not for the faint of heart. Or anyone with eyes.

Who knew such garments were readily available. God BLESS the internets!