8:04 p.m. - I can't guarantee I'll blog for this entire game. And I'm not going to guarantee an OSU victory. But I CAN guarantee that no matter what happens, I won't enjoy anything else this evening as much as I did dancing in the kitchen earlier to Marvin Gaye's "Got To Give It Up" with my niece (including her self-proclaimed "booty shaking") and then having crazy nephew #2 snuggle under the crook of my arm and announce "this is my favorite thing." So while I obviously want OSU to win, it's not the end of the world if they don't.

Remind me I said that in three hours...

8:15 p.m. - I am more than twice the age of OSU's starting QB. That stings a little. But he just ran for a sweet first down, so I'll get over it.

8:17 p.m. - Instead of cheering "Go Buckeyes," Crazy nephew #2 (who should be in bed) is chanting "Go Butt-guys."

8:28 p.m. - Listening to Herbie talk about penetration reminds me of the flick "Wildcats," when Goldie Hawn screams, "Do you know how to get good penetration?" Underrated movie.

8:36 p.m. - Speaking of Herbie, my first-round attire is my favorite "Kirk Herbstreit knows football" shirt. I have a change of clothes, should I need to change to help the team's fortunes. Of course, I tried that during the title game against Florida two years ago and that didn't help at all.

8:42 p.m. - Ooh, "Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown." Note to self - remember to watch that.

8:43 p.m. - I hope no one is actually reading this for game analysis. There won't be much of that.

8:48 p.m. - My brother has just made the first anti-Musberger reference of the evening. Something about shoving a microphone up his cornhole.

9:00 p.m. - I can't say I'm thrilled with this field position. OSU at its own 3. This is where bad things happen.

9:01 p.m. - Wow, Michigan lost to MSU by 14. The folks in Ann Arbor cannot be happy. OOOH - but here's who is happy - OSU fans. Great catch and run across midfield.

9:04 p.m. - Well, I've just dropped my first F bomb as in "What the fuck was that?"

9:10 p.m. - Amazing. Less than five minutes left in the first half and no scoring thus far. Let's hope that's not the kiss of death...

9:12 p.m. - Son of a bitch. That's what I get. I'll keep my mouth shut henceforth. Not that they've scored, but they are certainly knocking on the door.

9:17 p.m. - I don't know who's running the music at ABC, but I wholeheartedly approve of the Zeppelin heading into commercial.

9:21 p.m. - If I could punch just one person with no repercussions, I think it might be Musberger.

9:28 p.m. - I wouldn't have guessed this game would be tied 3-3 at the half. There will now be a brief break from this scintillating live blog for halftime, during which I will visit Crazy Nephew #1, who has been yelling for me from upstairs for a while.

10 p.m. - I know the game has been back for a while. I have been too but just haven't had anything to say. I mean, let's be honest. This game is a bit boring. It's a good match-up, but boring.

10:17 p.m. - I don't want to say this game is losing me, but I'm currently clipping coupons. And that is not a euphemism for anything.

10:30 p.m. - Uggghhhh. I need more wine....

10:31 p.m. - My college roommate just sent me a text that reads: "Fuck!! This game!!"

10:40 p.m. - In what seems like the ninth hour of this game, there is finally a touchdown. Unfortunately, OSU did not score it.

10:40:30 p.m. - Holy crap. What the hell just happened? Does the freshman need the challenge of leading the offense 95 yards down the field? I don't think so.

10:48 p.m. - Here's been my verbal commentary for the last minute: "Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Dumbass. Fuck. Fuck."

10:49 p.m. - Wow, the World Series game in Philly actually started? That is going to end LATE.

10:58 p.m. - Down seven with 1:07 to go. I wonder which Jets team will show up tomorrow.

11:06 p.m. - I wonder what channel the baseball's on...